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You know I'm always promoting the dissolution of most gender roles and differences? Well, that hasn't happened yet, so now I'm going to talk about the world in which we live, in which the female experience varies from the male experience - to different degrees based on numerous factors. In this world, the female experience is lacking a voice in history, art, the media, politics and academia. Women are represented in most public spheres in numbers far, far less than their proportion of the total population.
Women are taught to identify with men - they have to, humanity is male. But men are not taught to identify with women. I don't even think that statement needs to be substantiated, really. Books, television, children's pasttimes, career paths, college majors, clothing, school curriculums, this is fucking everywhere.
( I don't have a particularly profound point, just that it upsets me and I think it probably contributes to violence against women and overall unhappiness )
A few links to pass on, since I've been collecting them and might as well share.
Starting with the lighter stuff!
"Strong Female Characters" - this says a lot of things that I've been trying to say. I was like "Yeeeeees." Strong female character is a meaningless term, it's not productive. The whole identification thing I talk about? That's helped when female characters are complex, human, fully fleshed out, real. It has nothing to do with how much ass they kick, how much power they hold, or how little they cry. She tries to search for a replacement for strong - I'd go with "real"? Or even "human."
Joey B and Violence Against Women - man, was I worried when I saw this, the blog is largely negative (as are most) and I really didn't think they were going to be handing out cookies, but Joey B did give a great speech and I'm happy they pointed me to it. Jilly B is super-awesome, I bet she helps Joey be so great.
And the media-related stuff. Two articles from The Hathor Legacy, an awesome blog. They're both by Jennifer Kesler, who I believe is the founder. These make me so angry.
On women and advertising - advertisers pay less for potential female viewers, because conventional wisdom is that 1) we're less likely to spend money on things? and 2) we're more likely to be watching TV anyway, so there's no demand. This means men are the assumed consumers, so programming is geared towards them - which, hey!, leads to the shit that I talk about above. (More on this from Ms. Kesler, cos Hollywood is oh my god so guilty as well. RAGE.) This is all run by "conventional wisdom" and inertia, not actual reason. I really recommend the blog, especially the Industry Buzz section. It articulates a lot of stuff that I vaguely sensed and demonstrates that none of this stuff is accidental.
On standards of beauty for successful actresses. GRRRRR. I don't think I talk about it as much as other things but believe me the appearance standards drives me crazy. I think men learn to fetishize things and again, that hurts everyone - men when their sex drive gets sort of screwed up, but more so women when they're encouraged to get plastic surgery.
And on men living in rape culture and allowing it to continue:
The initial article, explaining that men raping women is part of our culture and it doesn't fucking have to be like that.
A response with links to other relevant articles
So sad, so serious, so well said.
One person mentioned a game kids were playing at a pool when she was 15 or 16. The guys had just started getting stronger than the girls and they started playing a game where the guys would pick up and dunk the girls. It was in fun and everyone was laughing, but the girls were incapable of physically fighting off the guys, and any objection - shrieking, squirming, struggling - was ignored and seen as part of the game. So the only way to not participate was for this woman to get out of the pool completely. Now, the game itself is not a horrible thing for these kids to have done. But in life, so many of us have to get out of the pool, we're unable to go swimming, because we know it's the only way we can protect ourselves. I could really relate to that, which is why I retyped it even though it's the least disturbing thing to come out of the discussion. Another woman mentioned how she spends too much time making sure she'd be a credible victim, which I can also relate to. I shouldn't have to be a virtuous stay-at-home for people to 1) not rape me and 2) believe me if I say I've been raped. I should be able to be in a drunken stupor at a frat party in a short skirt and I should be safe.
Women are taught to identify with men - they have to, humanity is male. But men are not taught to identify with women. I don't even think that statement needs to be substantiated, really. Books, television, children's pasttimes, career paths, college majors, clothing, school curriculums, this is fucking everywhere.
( I don't have a particularly profound point, just that it upsets me and I think it probably contributes to violence against women and overall unhappiness )
A few links to pass on, since I've been collecting them and might as well share.
Starting with the lighter stuff!
"Strong Female Characters" - this says a lot of things that I've been trying to say. I was like "Yeeeeees." Strong female character is a meaningless term, it's not productive. The whole identification thing I talk about? That's helped when female characters are complex, human, fully fleshed out, real. It has nothing to do with how much ass they kick, how much power they hold, or how little they cry. She tries to search for a replacement for strong - I'd go with "real"? Or even "human."
Joey B and Violence Against Women - man, was I worried when I saw this, the blog is largely negative (as are most) and I really didn't think they were going to be handing out cookies, but Joey B did give a great speech and I'm happy they pointed me to it. Jilly B is super-awesome, I bet she helps Joey be so great.
And the media-related stuff. Two articles from The Hathor Legacy, an awesome blog. They're both by Jennifer Kesler, who I believe is the founder. These make me so angry.
On women and advertising - advertisers pay less for potential female viewers, because conventional wisdom is that 1) we're less likely to spend money on things? and 2) we're more likely to be watching TV anyway, so there's no demand. This means men are the assumed consumers, so programming is geared towards them - which, hey!, leads to the shit that I talk about above. (More on this from Ms. Kesler, cos Hollywood is oh my god so guilty as well. RAGE.) This is all run by "conventional wisdom" and inertia, not actual reason. I really recommend the blog, especially the Industry Buzz section. It articulates a lot of stuff that I vaguely sensed and demonstrates that none of this stuff is accidental.
On standards of beauty for successful actresses. GRRRRR. I don't think I talk about it as much as other things but believe me the appearance standards drives me crazy. I think men learn to fetishize things and again, that hurts everyone - men when their sex drive gets sort of screwed up, but more so women when they're encouraged to get plastic surgery.
And on men living in rape culture and allowing it to continue:
The initial article, explaining that men raping women is part of our culture and it doesn't fucking have to be like that.
A response with links to other relevant articles
So sad, so serious, so well said.
One person mentioned a game kids were playing at a pool when she was 15 or 16. The guys had just started getting stronger than the girls and they started playing a game where the guys would pick up and dunk the girls. It was in fun and everyone was laughing, but the girls were incapable of physically fighting off the guys, and any objection - shrieking, squirming, struggling - was ignored and seen as part of the game. So the only way to not participate was for this woman to get out of the pool completely. Now, the game itself is not a horrible thing for these kids to have done. But in life, so many of us have to get out of the pool, we're unable to go swimming, because we know it's the only way we can protect ourselves. I could really relate to that, which is why I retyped it even though it's the least disturbing thing to come out of the discussion. Another woman mentioned how she spends too much time making sure she'd be a credible victim, which I can also relate to. I shouldn't have to be a virtuous stay-at-home for people to 1) not rape me and 2) believe me if I say I've been raped. I should be able to be in a drunken stupor at a frat party in a short skirt and I should be safe.
