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Apr. 2nd, 2009 12:00 amPssst! April Fools! Apart from the fact that I've never ever heard that interpretation of anything in the bible, the text itself makes it pretty clear that no buttsex is happening between Joseph and Potiphar. Potiphar was more interested in letting Joseph run his place so he could relax. Seems so plausible, though, doesn't it?
Actually I had a hard time finding something to make a suitable Bible April Fools because there's so much legit wackiness in the bible that any exaggeration or fabrication ended up being totally implausible. There is no way to make circumcision seem more bizarre than it already is.
Anyway, to make up for the fake buttsex, a quote from 1 Samuel (I think - I typed it up before). This one is ALL REAL:
When David had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was bound to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day and would not let him return to his father's house. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David, because he loved him as his own soul. Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that he was wearing, and gave it to David, and his armor, and even his sword and his bow and his belt.
But if you really want biblical gay, I'm all about Paul and Timothy.
Actually I had a hard time finding something to make a suitable Bible April Fools because there's so much legit wackiness in the bible that any exaggeration or fabrication ended up being totally implausible. There is no way to make circumcision seem more bizarre than it already is.
Anyway, to make up for the fake buttsex, a quote from 1 Samuel (I think - I typed it up before). This one is ALL REAL:
When David had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was bound to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day and would not let him return to his father's house. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David, because he loved him as his own soul. Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that he was wearing, and gave it to David, and his armor, and even his sword and his bow and his belt.
But if you really want biblical gay, I'm all about Paul and Timothy.
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Date: 2009-04-02 04:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-02 04:57 am (UTC)Aaaaaaaand that is an awesome quote *g*
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Date: 2009-04-02 12:53 pm (UTC)Yeah, I was like "I bet David did something that I can make gay" and then I saw that and it was like "D: Thanks Bible! Ya scooped me!" I think Jonathan later betrays David? But I'm not sure. Anyway, it would probably make some pretty epic fanfic. >.>
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Date: 2009-04-02 11:18 am (UTC)Buttsex.
:(
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Date: 2009-04-02 12:54 pm (UTC)I mean, um. Sorry! The Bible is fairly short on buttsex, although I guess it's slashy in that "network television can see it if you're looking" way.
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Date: 2009-04-02 06:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-02 07:05 pm (UTC)P.S. I still love this icon. XD
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Date: 2009-04-03 02:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-03 03:03 pm (UTC)Oh man, I seriously want to be on public television. That would be living the dream!
Hey, so! I was just talking about you - is there a time in May or June (first two weeks of May, any time in June) that I could possibly visit you for a few days? Will you still be in Noho? I'm planning to take a vacation so I thought i could come up for part of it. :D